Name a Less Iconic Duo

art and article by Sarah Chefka

  1. Cornell University and your mental health
  2. Your emotional labor and the emotionally unavailable people to whom you devote it
  3. Fraternity culture and toxic masculinity
  4. The Student Assembly & its disappointing thoughts on Cornell Cinema
  5. An open table at Zeus and the time you willfully waste attempting to find one—time you will never get back, no matter how hard you may try
  6. Books you want to read for fun and the anxiety that comes with the knowledge that you are not reading them
  7. Online shopping as a coping mechanism and the emptiness you feel when your purchase is delivered and you try on the Zara camisole dress and you somehow… still… aren’t…happy
  8. Getting a plant and the guilt you experience when you inadvertently, but inevitably, kill it—it’s dead and it’s your fault, everything is your fault—
  9. Libe Slope and the relatively tiny amount of oxygen your lungs are capable of retaining as you ascend aforementioned slope.
  10. Okenshields & the embarrassing Hot 100 club bops from 2010 garishly, carelessly played in its halls
  11. The Cornell Store and the exorbitant price of a 1-subject notebook
  12. Science requirements and the fact that you are not really all that interested in science and you are still required to complete them
  13. AEM finance bros & their overbearing sense of conceited entitlement
  14. The desire for social media validation and the knowledge that it will never be enough
  15. Falsely thinking you have the self-control necessary to take a 20-minute nap and your inevitable failure to do so as the cursory nap transforms into a 3-hour-long siesta
  16. White people and colonialism
  17. Softboys & the way they think they’re soooo misunderstood just because they read Bukowski and smoke weed and are fundamentally incapable of communicating their emotions to you in a healthy, adult manner
  18. The bottled water industry and the ever-exacerbating reality that is climate change
  19. Capitalism and the political, social, and economic needs of the proletariat
  20. The jarring juxtaposition between who you are and who your 8-year-old self thought you would be at this point in your life.

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